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Domestic Violence - At home but not safe!

Updated: Jul 30, 2020

Domestic Violence can also be called Domestic Abuse is viciousness committed by someone to you in your family circle. It is not only done by your husband/wife even if it is by your parents, in-laws and other family members too.

Abuse can happen to anyone in any form especially Verbal and Emotional. It occurs within all age groups, ethnic backgrounds, and economic levels.

You might be experiencing somehow Domestic Abuse if someone in your family who:

  • Calls you names, insults you or puts you down

  • Prevents or discourages you from going to work or seeing family members or friends

  • Tries to control how you spend money, where you go, what medicines you take or what you wear

  • Unnecessarily jealous or possessive or constantly accuses you of being unfaithful

Forms of Domestic Violence:

  1. Physical Abuse

  2. Sexual Abuse

  3. Economic or Financial abuse: When one tries to control your access to economic resources. She/he may involve preventing you from resource acquisition, limiting what you may use, close monitoring of how much money you spent, preventing spending without their consent.

  4. Emotional or Psychological abuse: Pattern of behaviour that threatens, dehumanizes or systematically undermines your self-worth. It also includes threats, isolation, public humiliation, unrelenting criticism, constant personal devaluation, repeated stonewalling and gaslighting

Roots of Domestic Violence:

Abuse is Learned behaviour. Sometimes people see it in their own families while growing up or learn it from their friends or popular culture.
  1. Childhood experiences: An abuser may have witnessed domestic violence during childhood and understood violence to be a way to maintain control within a family.

  2. Economic circumstances

  3. Feeling insecure or have a complex with someone

Why does it happen?

  1. Traditional beliefs: Some people with very traditional beliefs may think they have the right to control their partner, son, daughter or daughter in law and that person isn’t equal to them.

  2. The desire of Power: Some people have the desire to gain and maintain power and control over them. They believe they have the right to control and restrict them. Maybe they think they know best and unequal relationships are ideal so they use abusive tactics to dismantle equality and make them feel less valuable.

How it happens:

It might not be easy to identify domestic violence at first. While some relationships are abusive from the starting, abuse often starts subtly and gets worse over time.

  • An abuser uses hurtful words and behaviours to control the victim.

Sometimes domestic violence begins or increases during pregnancy, putting your health and the baby's health at risk.

Even if your child isn't abused, simply witnessing domestic abuse can be harmful. Children who grow up in abusive homes are more likely to have behavioural problems than are other children.

Break the cycle

Domestic violence or any kind of abuse is used for one purpose and one purpose only: to gain and maintain total control over you. She/he doesn’t “play fair.” and uses fear, guilt, shame, and intimidation to wear you down and keep you under their thumb.

The bottom line is that abusive behaviour is never acceptable, whether from a man, woman, teenager, or an older adult. You deserve to feel Valued, Respected, and Safe.


The longer you stay in an abusive relationship, the greater the physical and emotional toll. You might become depressed and anxious, or begin to doubt your ability to take care of yourself. You might feel helpless or paralyzed.

The only way to break the cycle of domestic violence is to TAKE ACTION.

Start by telling someone about the abuse, whether it's a friend, loved one, health care provider or other close contacts. You can also call a national domestic violence hotline.

At first, you might find it hard to talk about the abuse. But understand that you are not alone and some people can help you. You'll also likely feel relief and receive much-needed support.

However, Abuse is a Choice, and it’s not one that anyone has to make. Regardless of the circumstances of the relationship or the pasts of either partner, NO ONE EVER DESERVES TO BE ABUSED.

Share your views on our forum or comment section. Also, share how can we bring change in our society. It is our responsibility to bring change first, at our home rather than looking for others. To usher change!

Through this Samanya platform, there is an opportunity for every one of us to bring a mass revolution of change within ourselves and our society by contributing their valuable time to the most precious world which we call as “our home" and strive to make our neighbourhood lively for a better today and tomorrow!

We are waiting for your valuable inputs and stories about how you brought even a small change in yourself or nearby!

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